Shiver me timbers. It be International Talk Like a Pirate Day again already! And the 10th such sea battle to boot, arrrr! Yer mighty Cap’n, Black Dougal o’ the good ship Pegu’s Pride has just a mite o’ piratical plunder on board here for ye this happy day. And beware if ye follow me Twitter feed, fer today all me usual political bluster, grog swilling, and noodity will be in our lovely pirate speak!
Belay that last! What manner of lubbery is this? There be no noodity in yer timeline… Or arrrrre ye holdin’ out on me?
Heh. A pirate can lie a wee bit to spice up interest, can’t he? Now quit harshing me pitch.
Let’s starrrrt with this little clip from Saturday Night Live, which I’d not seen before. It gives us what ye’d be seein’ in the event of a hapless lubber, or worse, an actor bein’ booked to appear in the queer and dangerous waters o’ an ITLAPD convention.
And speakin’ o’ pirate conventions, there be a whole fleet of such buccaneerin’ events in real life, too! Here’s a good listing to be perusin’, with both full-on piratical parties, and scurvy add-ons, like last week’s Pirate Weekend at the near by to me Ohio Ren Fest. This motley lot o’ sea dogs in Tampa really go the extra mile.
Ol’ Chumbucket and Cap’n Slappy do a bosun’s job of keeping their brain
fart child new and interesting year after year. This year, they have a video contest. Here’s the best of the submissions from all over the seven seas that I’ve seen:
Now all hands on deck, me hearties! It wouldn’t be right if the good ship Pegu’s Pride didn’t offer up a delectable concoction fer yer guzzlin’ pleasure! Me personal favorite swill fer ITLAP has always been a Grog of one sort or another, but this year let’s weather the storm of… The Hurricane!
Now listen carefully, me beauties. The Hurricane was invented in New Orleans at Pat O’Brien’s saloon. But ye don’t be drinking yer Hurricane like they make it there, or I’ll have ye walk the plank! And after swilling one of those alcohooolic koolaids they make now, ye will want to!
The real Hurricane is so simple to make, ye can whip it up by dead reckoning, swabby! So get to it this evening, and ye be doin’ it right, ye hear? Or….
And so help me, if ye so much as reach for that vodka bottle, ye’ll get no chance at the plank. Yer crew’ll just shoot ye and feed ye straight to the fishes!
- 4 oz. good, dark, funky Jamaican rum, like Smith and Cross(bones)
- 2 oz. juice from fresh lemons ye picked last week on that island where the treasure is buried.
- 2 oz. Passionfruit syrup. The better, the better.
Shake the ingredients with crushed ice and pour the bonny concoction, unstrained, into a glass.
What kind of glass? A Hurricane glass, ye lubber, or I’ll give ye the hook!
Lastly, it be time to roundup this year’s collection of Rule 5 pirate wenches, with nods to the commercial propositions that outfit them and yer own beauties, too. Arrr!
First is Molly Roger Fashions, fer all yer wenchly t-shirts and dresses that yer beauty will need several hurricanes before appearing in public in….
Molly Roger is connected to photographer Tiger(rrrr) Lee, who be specializin’ in both pirate portraiture fer lads and lassies…
And in pirate pin-ups, too. Garrrr!
His new calendar is available to plunder today!
That be it, crew! Now get out there and talk like a pirate!