In Other News, Robert De Niro Has But the Most Tangential Acquaintance With What the F**k a Martini Is

From the instructions he sends out to you just in case he decides to attend your party: Gin, chilled glass, small pour size. Check, check, check. That last item is especially well put (read the New York Post’s article).
So far so good. He sounds like a reasonable man here. Why am I getting so hot under the collar?

Shake for 45 seconds…!
Muddled cucumber…?
“No vermouth necessary.”?!?!

Tangential. At. Best.
Yes, I’m talkin’ to you, Bob. It might be a fine drink, whatever it is, but show some respect in the future. I don’t want to hear you taking the name of the Gospel of Gin in vain again.
(Thanks to @Teekeemon for his alertly twigging me to this cultural travesty.)

About the author


I am 48 years old, married with two young daughters. My interests are tennis, reading, computers, politics, and of course cocktails. I run a murder mystery party business that caters to both corporate and private events, Killing Time, murder consultants.


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  • Yes, I know this is a travesty, but it’s F***ing Bobby DeNiro! He shows up on the other side of the bar, he’s getting whatever the heck he wants! The same goes for Robert Duvall, Bill Murray, Jack Nicholson or Gene Hackman!

      (Quote)  (Reply)

    • Bobby De Niro or Joe Blow, if he’s on the other side of the bar, he gets what he wants. That’s Bartender Bushido, right? Or home host bushido, if the home host has the supplies.

      I’m just sticking out my Martini Nomenclature Bigotry for all the world to see!

      Cucumbers and no vermouth…..

        (Quote)  (Reply)

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